(Cue to Kurt: it is time for the photoshopped pic of our new right fielder, using my October article as a starter)

Everybody thinks this is crazy.

Gordo.  Couchie.  DeLuca.  The new guy at teh Bright One.  Miles.  VanDyck.  Actually, VanDyck isn't too terribly concerned.  Duk and Andy. Deadspin.  The COI guys.  Everyone.  All think we are absolutely nuckin futts for bringing this guy in for a three year marraige with some of the most drunken and doucheworthy bleacherites and, (more dangerously), right field box fans in all of creation.  Especially the boxes.  Them walls are short.  If a backup catcher like Chad Krueger can get up in there, then definitely they won't deter an enraged Milt the Stilt.

I realize that no other human in the AL in 2008 had a higher OPS than Milton Bradley, and, lacking any other free agent sluggers who might field better, and also lacking the nuttsacks to swing a trade for an Andre Ethier or a Brad Hawpe, obtaining Bradley's services might be the best move for Jim Hendry to fill our needs, from a talent standpoint. 

But I did what you all did - I looked on the back of his baseball card.  He has played exactly ONE (1) season I would consider to be a full one - with LA about five years ago.  Last year's season, rate-wise, was his most productive.  On a one-year salary, Hooray!  HOWEVER, because I'm a Cub fan and a masochist (redundancy alert!) and because I have all sorts of faith in my fellow man, I believe in my withered little heart that maybe, perhaps, there is reason to believe that Bradley will stay healthy the next three years.

OOOkay, that was a Huge Leap of Faith.  But Hendry did it, I did it, and I have no problem with it.  But.

It is one thing to swill some blue Kool Aid and believe that a man like Bradley will avoid the trainer's table.  It COULD happen.  But, how about the whole hyper-sensitivity issue, coupled with the obnoxious rumpholes that tend to spend their summer days in the World's Largest Saloon?

Roman Modrowski, fine man that he is, admitted today on his blog that he has heard racial comments from the stands about Kosuke Fukudome, but that he has never heard any racial comments intended for African Americans.

N!&&@, pleeeeze!

I've heard it in Wrigley, more times than I care to count.  The racial abuse Jock Jones took from the CF bleachers during Game 3, 2007, made me thoroughly Ashamed to be a Cub fan, and I have sworn off that particular portion of the ballpark forever as a result.  Jones might be many things - he wasn't lying about us and the Black crap.

So you have a pairing of the most hypersensitive man in Baseball, along with some of the most boorish drunks in America. 

The only way the Milton Bradley Era is going to work for us is for one of the parties to change.  Either Bradley needs to turn a deaf ear to the crowd, or we have to work as one to cut the racial bullsh!t.  And what are the odds of us working as one?? Are you responsible for me?  Am I responsible for you?  Is anyone responsible for ANYTHING they say after having spent over a hundred dollars for beer on a particular day?

So, Milton, Mr. Bradley, sir?  It ain't right, and it ain't fair, but you're making the bank, so I guess it's YOU that's gonna have to man up.   

Good luck with that, man.