Goatriders of the Apocalypse

Spin Training

Just a few tidbits from Arizona to keep you warm at night:

  • ___________ is in the best shape of his life and will be healthy all year long.
  • ___________ has been working on a few surprise pitches that will take the league by storm in 2009.
  • Lou Piniella has no doubts that ___________ will do an amazing job in his new role with the team.

You could almost drop the "r" and the "g" from Spring Training and it would still be accurrate.  It's always about Spin, and as a Cub fan who's seen plenty of years in which his team started out with great promise - at least according to the journalists covering the team - I take none of it for granted.

Today's headline is this: Lou Piniella postures for Soriano to bat leadoff.  No, sorry, it's actually called Piniella thinks Soriano can steal 30 bases, as written by Goat Friend Paul Sullivan.  Soriano apparently has benefitted from a new "off-season conditioning program in the Dominican Republic."  Plus, Piniella says that the Fonz is only using a half-hop to catch the ball in the outfield.  Frankly I don't understand why Soriano can't try a different rare maneuver called "the two handed glove catch."  It's really old school, but nobody uses it anymore and since he'd be the only one, just maybe he'd make some highlight reels due to the rarity of the move.  Maybe we can snazz up the name a little to catch Sori's eye - call it "the double wobble-dobbler half-hat back turn yellowbird two handed glove catch macgillicutty."  Who wouldn't want to use it?

Anyway, I would caution any reader from getting too worked up by a Spring Training spin job.  Sorry, Cubs fans, but Player A probably isn't in the best shape of his life.  Player B probably won't be bringing shock and awe to the league with each delivery of his mysterious scrizz pitch.  And Player C is furious with his new role with the team and is sowing dissent in the clubhouse.  It's just the way of life.

What's Tainin?

What's Tainin?

aw dammit...

beat me to it.

Great points!

great article, I love your point about The Fonz's little hop when he catches a flyball. That makes me furious everytime I see him catch a fly ball, I mean come on Sori! The best way to prove that you are a good defensive player is not to do your little "Fruit Hop", but in fact to catch the damn ball everytime it is hit to left field! No hop needed!

"off-season conditioning program in the Dominican Republic."

This doesn't involve Angel Presinal or Yuri Sucart does it?

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