As a Cubs fan that lives in St. Louis, I have many Cardinals fan friends. Considering the great season (despite their recent slide), I decided to ask them what would they do if the Cubs would win the World Series. Most of the responses went like this, “But they won’t win the World Series. They are the Cubs.” I would press and say if the Cubs ever win the World Series what would they do. They simply repeat their mantra about the Cubs. Then it dawned upon me. It is not that they believe any billy goat curse, or they think the Cubs will never win a World Series. Cardinal Nation needs to believe that the Cubs will never win World Series. It is the only constant in their. For example, during the 1950s Arkansas (part of Cardinal Nation) when desegregation was forced to take effect, there was only one constant the Cardinals fans there could latch onto, the Cubs sucked. In Kentucky, during the mid 1980s a family learns their favorite show Joanie Loves Chachi has been cancelled, their only piece of happiness is the fact the Cubs still sucked. In Southern Illinois, when Van Halen dumped Sammy Hagar, who is huge in the St. Louis area, the fans of the Red Rocker had only thing that could steady them. Once again, the fact that the Cubs suck helped them through hard times. Now, the year is 2008. The business that defines St. Louis, Anheuser-Busch, was bought by the Flemish company, InBev. What would happen if the Cubs win the World Series? St. Louis would probably collapse into a giant, fiery, sinkhole. Those who survive the sinkhole would die from their heads exploding because their minds could not comprehend that the team from Wrigleyville just defied what they considered a law of nature. Those who survive the sinkhole and head explosion will face fate worse than death; they will have a nice breakfast of fish with Len Kasper at their local airport. As person who lives in St. Louis, I don’t want to see my friends’ heads explode nor to seen them have fish with Len Kasper. That is why I need to say, “Thank you, Derrek Lee for continually grounding into double plays when the bases are loaded. Carlos Zambrano keep on punching that Gatorade cooler. If you stop, you would have a healthy shoulder and the Cubs might have a chance to win it all. Kosuke Fukudome, thank you for playing like the strange love child of So Taguchi and a whirling dervish. If you continued hitting like you were in the early season, the Cubs would have broken 90 wins already. Once again my friends, the rest of Cardinal Nation, and I thank you."

Madisoncubaholic

I could see it in 2003 when Kerry Wood did not "have it" in game seven screaming at the TV to get a starter warming up while we were up 5 to 3 after Moises' home run but Dusty wouldn't buy into "it's game seven everyone is eligible". I could see it at the end of the year in 2007 when previously unhittable Marmol started serving up gopherballs. I can see it this year too. Kerry Wood is worse than "Wild Thing" and Marmol is reverting. Lee can't hit. Kosuke is done. Theriot is tired ...again, Lou is making wierd decisions ...again. A rookie's first at bat in a deciding moment of a pennant race and strikeout game over with Hoffpauer on the bench. I want to see a Cubs team win DAMNIT ! It's been three lifetimes coming and this year might just hurt the most after the expectations. Would you rather limp into the playoffs or get hot at the end scamper in as the wild card and take it all ? I'll push the DAMN RED BUTTON !!! ABANDON HOPE ALL YE WHO ENTER. BREAK THE CYCLE OF CUBS VIOLENCE TAKE THOSE CUBS HATS OFF YOUR KIDS , DECALS OFF THE CARS, GOLF CLUB COVERS OFF THE CLUBS. YOU CAN CHOKE THE CHICKEN BUT YOU CAN'T CHOKE THE GOAT. PUSH THE BUTTON AAAAAGHH!!!!!! PUSH THE BUTTON IT'S DONE.