Goatriders of the Apocalypse

Series Preview: Cubs vs. Brewers


A few months ago this four-game series looked like a season-defining moment. Now it’s just an attempt by two meh-ish to become eh-ish teams. How disappointing. Especially since I have tickets for one of these games. Damn September.

Anyway, it’s been a season of disappointment for both teams, so which one of them will age through the twilight of the season gracefully and which one will crap their pants hysterically?

Let’s find out.

The Matchups
September 14th - Jeff Suppan vs. Ryan Dempster
Suppan has had a tough season. More specifically he has had a tough three months. Suppan has only won one start since June 12. This is probably because he has given up more hits (86) than innings pitched (65) in that time period. Just sayin’.

Believe it or not, Dempster is pitching for his 10th win of the season. It seems almost as improbable as Taylor Swift winning Female Music Video of the year, but it’s going to happen. Did you hear that Kayne West? It’s going to happen.

September 15th - Yovani Gallarado vs. Carlos Zambrano
Two aces, two average records, two decent ERAs. While both Gallarado (12-11, 3.59) and Zambrano (8-6, 3.77) don’t have the worst numbers in the world, neither is throwing like an ace should throw. Let’s see someone earn his paycheck…preferably not the guy from Milwaukee.

September 16th - Braden Looper vs. Rich Harden
Despite a 4.77 ERA, Looper has a 12-6 record on the season. I guess that makes him the ace of the staff. Then again, ever since Sabathia and Sheets left, the word “ace” has been used rather liberally with the Brewers.

Despite how well Harden has been pitching since the All-Star Break, his last start says a lot about why the Cubs might not bring him back next season. Although he only gave up two hits and one earned run while striking out six, he also walked five batters and threw 103 pitches in only four innings. Harden needs to show he can be more efficient.

September 17th - Dave Bush vs. Randy Wells
Bush has pitched well in his last two starts going seven innings in both contests while only giving up three earned runs combined. He also struck out 11 batters on only 97 pitches in his last start against the D-Backs.

Wells was on the wrong end of some bad defense in his last start, which usually doesn’t bode well for a sinkerball, contact pitcher. Can’t really put the fault on Randy for that one. The last time Wells faced the Brewers was during his 2009 debut on May 8. He pitched five scoreless innings.

It amazes me that a team with so much offensive power as the Brewers have can have such a bad season. Then again, it amazes me that a team with as high a payroll as the Cubs can suck so much.

So I guess all we have left to play for is pride. I don’t want my team to lose to a team from Wisconsin. Wisconsin only exists to serve as a playground for Illinois. I am convinced that everyone who resides in Wisconsin is a hired actor. The place is just a gigantic theme park.

Go Cubs.

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