Goatriders of the Apocalypse

Game Recap: Mets 7, Cubs 6

The playoff roster roulette table keeps on spinning, and tonight Micah Hoffpauir made his statement against Pedro Martinez and the Mets.  Hoffpauir went 5 for 5 tonight against New York, with a double, 2 homeruns, 5 runs driven in, and after the game he reportedly cleaned the Augean stables and captured the girdle of Hippolyte*. But, alas, the Cubs were doomed to lose anyway, thanks in part to Lou responsibly saving his top relievers for games that matter.

(*For Googlers of the Labors of Herakles, welcome.  Thanks for the clicks.  Sorry about not being what you were looking for.  But for a great resource on Greek Myth, consult the Perseus Digital Library ... although if you want to be blown away by verifiable modern-day myth, just Google Micah Hoffpauir.  Dude jacked 2 in one game tonight.)

Speaking of roulette*, Neal Cotts worked tirelessly to get onto Lou Piniella's shiz-list tonight with a rocky 8th inning.  He was last seen being chased from the mound by Piniella, yelling "but you need me!" as he ducked into the tunnel leading to the clubhouse.  Bob Howry quickly joined Cotts by giving up 2 RBI hits upon relieving the inept lefty.

(*For Googlers looking for rules about the game of roulette ... ehhh, forget it.  You came to the wrong place.  I mean, you Googled "roulette."  Why the heck did you click on a link that said "Goat Riders of the Apocalypse?"  Did you think it was some witty play off the term "let it ride!"?  And if so, how the heck could you justify the Goat and the Apocalypse part of our name?  I mean, seriously!)

No worries.  While the Cubs are now incapable of winning 100 this year, they remain poised to win all the games that actually matter.  What's more, they are in an excellent position to spoil the hopes of the hapless Milwaukee Brewers, who are on the brink of completing their Wild Card collapse.  All they have to do is beat them, and that's something the Cubs have enjoyed doing all year long.

The Playoff Roster

While we continue to debate Hoffpauir's inclusion, and while we ponder the image of Neal Cotts sneaking into Lou's hotel room at night and feverishly whispering "you need me!" over and over again as our skipper slumbers, it has been confirmed by ESPN that the Game 1 starter will be Dempster.

Clownsevelt will also apparently get one final tune-up before the end of the season, although he will be limited to a mere 75-80 pitches against the Brewers tomorrow night.  While Brandon Webber has to be the hands-down favorite to win the Greg Maddux Award this year, Dempster should get more than a few votes.

Series Recap

You are still focused on the frightening image of Neal Cotts whispering into the ear of Lou Piniella.  Well, here's a fun fact for you to think about once you get over the convulsions...

The New York Mets, desperate for a playoff spot and fighting two teams to earn one, were barely able to split a series from a Cubs team that batted back-ups and call-ups 80 times in the 4 game series.

C'mon.  How can you not feel good about this team?  And Smitty - where are you, man?  I want a recant!

Feelin' good?

"How can you not feel good about this team?"

I've got two words for ya: Cotts, Howry.

i think craig nailed that one!

need i say more

Even if they make the playoff

Even if they make the playoff roster, do either of you think Lou is ever going to use them in a situation like the one from last night? He was doing the responsible thing and giving Smardz, Marmol, and Wood the night off.

I'm afraid to say anything positive...

...negativity seems to be working pretty well. Suppose I do recant and the Cubs start circling the drain? What then?

I guess there's no since hiding it, after winning about four in a row after my rant, I quietly removed the fork and put them back in the oven.

Speaking of forks, I forked out $350 for three nosebleed seats at The Grease Pit last weekend, and the Colts shat the bed in spectacular fashion.

Hmm. Sounds like you're

Hmm. Sounds like you're jinxy.

I decided - as if a decision like this can ever really be made - a few years ago that fans proclaiming victory (or defeat) has no impact on the play in the field. Maybe we feel like tools for announcing to the world that the Cubs will win it all, only to watch them get swept, but I don't think we actually effect causality.

Or, more appropriately, it's like my dad telling me that since we vote for opposite political parties, his vote will cancel mine out, so I shouldn't even bother. For every Cub fan proclaiming that our team will win the World Series, there are likely an equal number of Brewer, Met, Phillie, Red Sox, Ray, Twin, White Sox, Angel, and Dodger fans out there making the same proclamations. Even if it's true that proclaiming it could jinx the team, we cancel each other out.

So, be fast and free with the optimism, my friend. It won't effect the games one bit. Really the only thing at stake is your heart getting broken again, and that would happen even if you kept your mouth zipped.

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