News and Notes (or "Jason wants to write again")
So, as it turns out, writing is the kind of thing where you have to do it or the ability goes away. Given that my "ability" was limited to various nerdisms and poo-jokes, I'm not sure if the break was a good idea. But a break I took, and so now in my own bed I will lie (lay? lye?). I'd like to say that I'm going to break out the funny (or the relevant) in this post , but I'm really just trying to get all the commas in the right places and keep the typos to a minimum, something I struggle with in the best of times. Given all this, I feel it is best to stick to a bullet list, some links, and minimal personal contribution.
But wait! What's this? I'm feeling the urge to write? The words...they're spilling out. Is it the wine? Or the frozen Tombstone pizza? What is the source of this inspiration? And how long can I keep rambling about my desire to write before I have to actually write something of value?
And did that count as two paragraphs? And is this now three?
These are all questions to which I have no answers and so I'm going with the bullet list after all. Here's what's happened in the world since I've left*
(* quick note: did anyone notice I was gone? Anyone? Hello?)
- Will Leitch left Deadspin. As it turns out, there are people over at Desipio who like to talk bad about Will, but I've never found him to be anything other than extremely polite and friendly. He's willingly submitted himself to my ridiculous interview questions (note: not a bad read, surprisingly. I usually can't stand reading my old writing) and has linked us on many an occasion, including our hand in the downfall of Stephen A. Smith. Dislike of Will Leitch continues to baffle me as I couldn't disagree more with the claims that he is "full of himself" or "a douche". All I ever noticed is a guy with midwest values living in the New York. I contend that Midwest values never leave you. Thanks for the entertainment lo these many years, Will, and good luck in the future.
- Blackhawks sign two of the top free agents available, giving Chicago the possibility of having the top teams in the NHL, NFL, NBA, NL, and AL. Of course, that just requires a Chicago team to win the Super Bowl, Stanley Cup, NBA Finals, ALCS and NLCS...yep, I called it here first.
- We decide that, no, particle physics isn't going to end the world as we know it. But if it did, it would be frickin' cool (you know,briefly).
- And guess who submitted her thesis? Yep, that's right, she's going to be a doctor. But not that kind of doctor, the cool kind. You know, the kind that can't heal you but can make a histogram of the frequency of your gaseous emissions, fit it to a Gaussian, and predict your next release. Now *that's* a real doctor.
So now you're saying, hey! You didn't talk about baseball! And I'm thinking, hay? Why are we talking about hay? Hay is for horses and grass is cheaper? And then I realize, that's a verbal joke. That doesn't make any sense in print. Clearly you said "hey". not "hay". But my point is, there was no need for me to talk about baseball. The rest of the gang here at Goat Riders has kept you up to date and well covered, much like a blanket...a blanket of words. And anything I could add regarding to Rich Hill's relation to Steve Blass or Derrek Lee's desire to double his pleasure could only serve to distract from the real story around these parts:
The Cubs are in first. The Cubs are getting healthy. The Cubs are going to be in even firstier very soon.
Take it to the bank.
And have the bank look at you curiously.
Because that wasn't a form of currency.
Just words. Not subject to inflation.