Goatriders of the Apocalypse

Game Recap: Cubs 0, Twins 2 - Open Forum!

Alright, we get it.

The Cubs starting pitchers are awesome, the relievers are OK--and the hitters just can't hit.

This is the 13th of the last 23 games where the Cubs have scored two or fewer runs.

Most of the Riders are busy this weekend (something about weddings and wives), so we're opening up this "recap" to you, the Goat Readers.

Question: How do we get this offense back on track?

Start by giving days off. I

Start by giving days off. I think give Theriot, Fukudome and Soriano tomorrow off, starting Blanco, Reed and Hoffy in their places.

I also think that a huge problem is Theriot is swinging for the fences every atbat, and he needs to relearn that he's a singles hitter who goes the other way.

Lee, Fontenot and Geo have been better as of late, Miles has been acceptable, and Bradley is making improvements, going 1 for 3 with a walk, and one of the outs he made was a very hard hit ball that was almost a double.

Brilliant, all the way

Brilliant, all the way around.

Really?

Candidly, I'm tired of all the days off.

I'm tired of seeing guys like Bradley miss time, play a game, then sit the next day because it's a day game after a night game. If I were the manager of this particular team, I'd stick them all in the same spot in the lineup every day.

I'd challenge their pride and put them in the same spot every day continuously until they pull themselves out of it. When a player is bounced around in a lineup, that presents a window, albeit small, to justify some of their struggles on not being comfortable moving around in the lineup. You'll rarely hear a player say he's tired of, say, hitting 5th every day.

A manager and a GM have to prove they're 'doing something' so they do stupid stuff like pinch hit in order to sac bunt and can the hitting coach, but managing/coaching has so precious little to do with what happens during the course of a game that I'd just let the players play through it without there being any possibility of me hindering their breakout.

Easy for me to say from my Barcalounger, I suppose.

Well I'm glad you asked:

First of all, we win by NOT having 13 pitchers on our roster. For a team that has the shittiest performing offense in recent history, we need more hitters. I don't know what Cubs management has up their asses; if it is the whole sale thing, this is getting ridiculous.

Demote David "Once a month" Patton. Period. Send him back to his former team, release him I don't give a shit but sitting on the bench and taking a roster spot while pitching once a month is F***ING BULLS**T. I CALL FOR THE HEAD OF JIM HENDRY.

Lou is going senile. That is a fact. He is basically giving up on this team too.

I am going to the game soon, where I will voice my displeasure with this team... also the Twins will probably outnumber Cub fans today, guaranteed. This team is pathetic.

Also I hate how Jake Fox gets demoted for 2 extra pitchers that will never be used.

Lemon Shakeup

Is there anything better than a funnel cake and a lemon shakeup? You'll have to excuse me, it's county fair season around the Bluegrass. All things considered though a shakeup can be refreshing.

Let's look at our beloved blue-clad warriors and see what we can come up with. Soriano is not a traditional leadoff hitter, and without a table setter things go to hell right quick don't they? Drop Soriano to the four slot and leave him there. The guy will eventually hit. He has to be left there though. Uncle Lou must stand firm.

The Riot. I love him, but the power surge has really jacked this guys swing up. Putting him one or two will force him to get on base. He seems like a smart enough player to know what role is required of him and what he has to do to fill that role.

D-Lee, Geo, and Lil' Mikey. Some guys just have bad seasons. It's a statistical probability. (Sounds really intelligent, huh) In reality I watch a lot of Mythbusters and they say it all the time. Geo will hit again. He will. The WBC jacked that guy all up. He sat behind Pudge while the coaching staff gave Rodriguez a month long tryout for a roster spot somewhere. Yes that was March. Ballplayers are creatures of habit. When your routine gets jacked up, you will suffer. Just ask ole' Wade "chicken-finger-lickin" Boggs.

D-Lee. He is starting to show signs of life, but he is Pete Rose with the Expos. A good ballplayer, but not the same. When the contract is up, we tip our caps and thank the man. I don't think a trade is a realistic possibility. Keep him batting fifth. Wether it hurts his feelings or not it's where he belongs nowadays.

Bottom line. We miss Rami. Badly. There are 8 guys everyday doing there best Rami imitation and they all kinda suck at it. Unlike last year where the team could make it through Soriano's injury, we are struggling this time around. Why? Because you can replace a guy who's not really a leadoff hitter with other guys who aren't leadoff hitters and get by. You can't replace a dangerous middle of the order guy with a handful of seven hole hitters and expect to win games.

Now my favorite part, my ridiculous super fan request; Package Milton Bradley, Kevin Gregg, and Derrek Lee of to Cleveland and bring back Dero and Woody. Give me back guys I know and love. Stick the Hoff at first. Then combine the genetic material of Freel, Fontenot, Theriot, and White Slice to create a super-scrappy utility infielder/outfielder named Scrapilodicus Rex.

Ride the storm out, kids even below .500 we are within 5 games of first. I really hope we stay out of first the majority of the season and close out the year with a division title in the last week and enter the playoffs on our first postseason "hot streak." Go Cubs!

I like

I like the name Scrapilodicus Rex. Does it have the appearence of a John Kruk or Rusty Staub or may-be Terry Forester.

A day off ?

How about a season off. Question who has the most selfish swing in baseball ? Is it Sosa or Soriano ? This year is reminding me of 2005. Quickly going down the sinkhole.

I swear you all sound like a bunch of 16 year old girls...

We are two and a half games out BEFORE the All Star break with our best hitter out on the DL. 2005? Give me an F'n break. Look at the majority of the teams that have won the World Series the last few years. They had to overcome adversity and got hot JUST in the nick of time. Im not making any bold predictions here but come on. Its way to early to be freaking out. Theres plenty of time and talent for this team to get it together and steamroll into the playoffs. Go Cubs!

Yes

Amen, brother!!

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