Announcing Cubs Basement Upgrade - Version 1.3
Many people have been pestering me the past couple of weeks about the condition of the Cubs Basement.
That's a lie. NOBODY has asked me about the condition of the Basement of Love, North Central Illinois' largest collection of Cubs parenphenalia!! As you may recall, I was forced to miss Senor Holy Shit's no-no in Milwaukee because of the sudden and unwanted invasion of a very small tributary of the Little Vermillion River, itself a tributary of the Vermillion River proper, it in turn being a tributary of the Illinois River, which of course flows into the Mighty Mississippi down around Alton. Of course, this very small tributary has disguised itself the past 75 years as a very minor drainage ditch, and 99% of the time does not contain enough water flow to sustain a minnow. But 10 inches of rain in 24 hours, coupled with the lack of proper sump pump parts has resulted in somewhat moderate damage to my personal Cubs museum; namely, the curling of paper-based items such as photographs and posters; the absorption of odors into felt-based items such as banners and pennants; and the condemnation and removal of all item-bearing furniture, such as cabinets and shelves. Not to mention all the flooring, baseboards, and everything else that was ankle deep or less.
Right now, the basement is in shambles. The Good News is that Mrs. Sloth had the basement and its contents insured!! The Insurance Rider of Love is making it possible for us to hire professional restoration experts (no kidding) to come in all this week and preserve all important artifacts, and the liberal replacement policy will permit me to update all the furniture and, hopefully I can make the accounting stuff work so that I can actually add a couple of new things I needed, like the pub table.
I couldn't juggle things so that I could venture straight into Version 2.0 (flat screen TV and the Cubs-themed upholstery, but things could absolutely be worse. My sympathies to everyone who has been less fortunate that I have been during this wet season, and I will update the galleries when everything is set up, hopefully in time for the "third round of playoffs", in which case I had planned on inviting the whole town of Corn Hole down there to watch with me..
I know, I'm the only one who gives a rat's ass, but ain't that what a blog is about?