Things I am thankful for ... of the Apocalypse
I'm probably not going to make "of the Apocalypse" a part of every post, but I'm amused to do so at this moment.
South of where I live right now, millions of families are digging into large turkeys covered in gravy, with gratuitous quantities of stuffing piled nearby, buried under heaping spoon fulls of mashed potatoes and corn, while a shelf full of pies await to be eaten. Unfortunately, I won't get to join in the festivities until Saturday.
But while I sit here, I thought I'd share with you some of the many things that I am thankful for.
- I'm thankful that the Cubs are headed in the right direction for once and aren't painful to follow
- I am thankful that our readers are intelligent, mostly cordial people happy to get involved in a debate regardless of how illogical I make the premise
- I am thankful for the GROTA staff. If the internets was a real place, the act of them "coming to work" would be seen as five beaten, broken men shuffling into a dank, dark room, where they then hunch over to slave on stories while I crack the whip and promise to pay them with pain. Well, maybe it's not that bad
- I'm thankful for the opportunities we've had in the past year. As I've already mentioned, we've grown massively in readership, we've been covered repeatedly by the national media, I got inducted into a society of 700 Cub fans including Dick Cheney, John McCain, Barack Obama, and Hillary Clinton, and our website got a kick-ass design that has apparently inspired many other Cubs blogs to follow suite. Yep, that's us, leading the way ... ya followers! Hah!
- On a personal level, I'm thankful for my fiancee, known in some circles by the name She's Canadian I Met Her At Niagara Falls You Wouldn't Know Her, or C. for short. Hey, anybody worth immigrating to a new country for is special, right?
- Most importantly of all, I am thankful of my immense talent to write. Someday I'm gonna be famous and you'll all be choking on my dust trails, motherf***ers! That's right! I said it! Because although the turkey's not here in Canada, the Wild Turkey is and I'm right where I wanna be ... at the top of the heap! What'reya gonna do about it? Huh? Huh? You wanna fight me? You wanna fight me?! Bring it on!
...ahem. Sorry about that. Got a little out of control with that last one. But in all seriousness, we've all stumbled across those blogs precociously written by people with 5 readers in total, and there's nothing quite as depressing as those... which isn't to say that I don't have other blogs with 5 readers in total. A blog is no better than the company it keeps, and you guys are awesome. I give thanks for that. So ... who wants to trade DeRosa and Lilly? C'mon, don't be shy, step up!